This is now the seventh time in the last 16 years we as a football loving nation are going to have to watch the team with the most irritating fans, the sleaziest owner, the prettiest quarterback, and the most sinister head coach play in our Super Bowl. Seven! Seven times this has happened now!
The first time the Patriots made the Super Bowl in the Belichick era, I remember it like it was yesterday. Drew Bledsoe went down that season, the Rams were innovating a new type of football and New England somehow sneaked to the Superdome for the right to play St. Louis when everyone was thinking Kordell Stewart was destined to come home and have that honor. Then, with the help of some incredible cinematography and world class spies, the Patriots did the unthinkable and unseated the Rams as the darlings of the NFL.
Two years later, another Louisiana quarterback fell victim to the Patriots when Jake Delhomme and the Carolina Panthers were this close to beating Tom Brady before Janet Jackson’s exposed nipple distracted their whole team. All of a sudden the Patriots weren’t a scrappy underdog story from a couple years ago, now they were a full fledged juggernaut who would be favored year in and year out. And they were the very next year as they got to the Super Bowl with ease, and outlasted the amazing heroics of Terrell Owens as Donovan McNabb puked away Philly’s first championship.
Some started to think the NFL’s newest dynasty would start to fade after their 3rd world title but a few years later after being called mortal, New England went undefeated in the regular season because of idiots in Oakland and the league office who somehow allowed them to acquire Randy Moss. Thankfully, the New York Giants saved us the first undefeated champions since 1972. The good guys won again in the rematch a few years later too and ding dong the witch was dead…..until she returned from the grave!
The Seahawks had the Patriot dynasty’s neck in the blocks with the guillotine ready to come down, but Pete Carroll threw the ball on the goal line and inexplicably New England had won their 4th championship when they were finally about to be buried forever.
Now, the only entity that can get us all to root against the red, white, and blue finds itself with an opportunity to get number five. A chance to be put into the pantheon of greatness when it comes to NFL franchises. Right now that group consists of Dallas, San Francisco, Green Bay, and the six time Super Bowl champion, the NFL’s premiere franchise, the Pittsburgh Steelers. If New England gets five, they are officially in this group. Only the never-won-a-thing Dirty Birds stand in their way and some might think this is a forgone conclusion, but to that I say: ENOUGH IS ENOUGH AND IT’S TIME FOR A CHANGE! This Super Sunday the most unlikely of teams will be the ones to end the tyranny once and for all and give us our colors back! Because the red, the white, and the blue do not belong to cheaters and spies, those colors belong to the land of the free and the home of the brave!