***WARNING: THIS TAKE CONTAINS EXTREME HEAT AND SHOULD NOT BE READ BY ANYONE***
The sun has risen on the Coach O era at LSU and a big bowl game is on the horizon, but the Citrus Bowl is not even the first thing on everyone’s mind. All anyone is concerned about is who the next offensive coordinator will be. This time of year everyone is waiting on something. You are waiting for that holiday time off. You are waiting for that Christmas bonus or you’re waiting for that New Year’s Eve kiss from your best gal. But if you are an LSU fan, you are constantly waiting on some kind of big news. The entire season you were waiting for Joe Alleva to make a decision on the next head coach. The waiting did not end there.
Now as we wait for quality family time and a bowl bonanza, we also wait for the man to turn LSU into the next factory of offensive innovation. This year, the most exhausting and confusing stuff wasn’t even on the field for the Tigers. It wasn’t the tough loss at Lambeau, it wasn’t the lack of points against Bama, and wasn’t even Derrius Guice running the wrong way versus Florida. This year the toughest thing to deal with for LSU fans was the waiting. Damn you Tom Petty!
We spent all summer building hype around a defense that was National Championship caliber, as we waited for the biggest LSU Football season of all time! Then shortly after those dreams were smashed into pieces, we waited for the next head man to be picked by LSU’s polarizing athletic director. It was an agonizing few months that dominated our airwaves and had us hearing the same talking points defending certain candidates over and over and over again. After all of that waiting it was finally revealed that the man who was there the whole time would be taking over permanently. Sweet! I enjoyed that ride. As tough as the waiting was, it was fun while it lasted because Coach O rules, but I do not know if I can even handle more waiting and I can only imagine what an LSU fan is going through. The waiting on the next offensive coordinator is surely going to ruin many many a Christmas.
You are going to be with brothers, uncles and cousins this holiday season, arguing nonstop about who the coordinator should be. “He couldn’t get Kiffin! He’s already a liar and a bust as head coach” your uncle says. “They need to get Mark Helfrich and pick up the pace!” proclaims your forward thinking cousin. You will be drunk on Christmas Eve shouting “I’m tellin ya uncle Boudreaux, it has to be Matt Canada! Creative running!”
I know this waiting period is extremely hard. The anticipation is enough to give you a coronary, but don’t let the waiting at LSU ruin your holidays. Someone will be named and we will dissect the hire and critique it until we are all blue in the face. I am sure whomever it is, they will have been Coach O’s first choice the whole time. After all, when he said “we gon’ get ’em” Ed Orgeron never really did say the name of “the best offensive coordinator in the country.” I guess we will just have to wait and see who that person is.