The Fave 5: Life After Football

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Caution: The Fave 5 is unfiltered, unapologetic, and completely uncensored!

5. Shoe Chuggin’

On paper, UFC 221 was not a card that jumped off the page and knocked you out with a flying knee. The night ended up being pretty entertaining if you somehow managed to drum up the courage to watch the event. Curtis Blaydes threw Super Samoan Mark Hunt all around the Octagon for a fun three rounds and Yoel Romero violently knocked out former champ, part-time model, and total jerkwad Luke Rockhold. If you watched the whole card though, you know that heavyweight up and comer Tai Tuivasa was the guy who stole the show. After knocking out Cyril Asker in a fight that was more of a human sacrifice, Tuivasa celebrate by doing an epic belly shake and then chugging a beer out of a fan’s shoe. A reporter asked Tuivasa about how hype works in the UFC after the fight and he said, “winners are grinners and losers eat shit.”

4. Matthew McConaughey

McConaughey is known for being a die hard Longhorns fan, but he always shows love to those who come from the Austin area. That is why Wooderson himself took out a full-page ad to do what we all were doing last week and that is show some love to Nick Foles for beating Tom Brady in the Super Bowl. The full-page ad in the Austin America-Statesman read: “From one local to another, congratulations Nick Foles. Just keep livin, Matthew McConaughey.” In a related note, Super Bowl viewing figures and statistics are finally being released in full and word is the most uttered phrase by fans watching Super Bowl LII as the game ended was “alright, alright, alright!”

3. The New Cavs

You think we all would be tired of mid-season panic about a LeBron James team by now, but every season there is doubt and the notion that a LeBron James team could be slipping and a door will finally open for another team in the east, and every season none of that happens. Once again we found ourselves questioning a LeBron James led team and once again it appears that all is going to be just fine. Cleveland traded everyone and winded up getting solid young players who actually play defense and because of that and also having LeBron James, they went out and beat the hell out of the Boston Celtics. Boston has the league’s best defense and Cleveland put up 121 points on them on the parquet. The New Cavs are proof that a good story, no matter how formulaic, is still a good story.

2. Overpaying QBs

Jimmy Garoppolo received a five-year $137.5 million extension in San Francisco last week. In regards to annual value, $27.5 per year, that is the biggest contract in NFL history and it was for a guy who has yet to win a truly important NFL game in his career. With Kirk Cousins, Drew Brees, and a few other QBs talking contract this off season; whether you are an old QB, an okay QB, or really just a QB who hasn’t proven he absolutely sucks just yet, you are going to get paid because even in the Age of the the Stewbum QB quarterbacks get their money.

1. No Football Sundays

What if I were to tell you that for the next six months, every Sunday you would have a completely free schedule where you could do whatever you wanted all day long without having to watch a frustrating football game? Seriously! You could do anything! You can go outside and observe nature, or binge watch the entire Netflix collection, or take up model train hobby, or become a baking whiz, or go balls deep into the Winter Olympics, or maybe even read some books; literally anything! Yeah we all have these grand schemes for how productive and fun we are going to make our Sundays, but in about a month when you are sitting there bird watching or whatever it is you decide you are going to do without the NFL, you will start pining for explanations on what a catch is and real reasons to hit the Sean Payton.